Monday Message: March 30, 2020

Put Yourself in Timeout

Yesterday, in Boca Raton, it was in the mid-80’s and the skies were perfect. It was such a beautiful day. I needed some things from the store… Sitting in my car ready to head out I stopped.

Complete silence, no news, no kids, no electronics. I sat there for 5 minutes just taking in the calm, the quiet and the beauty of the day. Things at that moment felt even safe, and I thought… “I need to put myself in timeout more often.

With everything going on it is easy to let our thinking get the best of us and take us to a place that doesn’t serve us. But how do we change our thoughts? The first thing we have to do is be aware of our thoughts. How does it actually feel in your body to have that thought of overwhelm, sadness, confusion and on. You will actually feel it. For some it is in your stomach. For others it goes to your head or it feels like you can’t breathe. When you are feeling something within your body… Listen to it. Take a timeout.

Thoughts create a “feeling” in our body that sets a whole host of actions or inactions on our part. Having a good thought sets us up for good action. Having bad thoughts set us up for actions that take us in a direction that we really don’t want to go.

Today, more than ever, you need to stop and listen to yourself. In these times of confinement and social distancing it is more difficult to be alone. To get away. To re-energize. To rethink your thoughts. But guess what, you are entitled to place yourself in timeout.

So consider telling your family, kids, significant other, that you are taking a little time. If you have kids at home, let them know and set the gentle boundaries. “Mommy is going to go and take a bath… And will be back in 1 hour to take you for a bike ride.” Or “Hey sweetie, I am going to wash the car and just wanted to let you know”.

Seriously and all joking aside, you have to permit yourself time to truly regroup, slow down, feel what you’re feeling and see if there is a better perspective on things. It is needed. There is a reason that they tell you to put your own mask on first before you help someone with theirs. So, for me I plan to take my daily run to the store for essentials (hint, hint) and enjoy the quiet and take in the good around me and refocus so I can be the best version of myself to serve those I love, my clients and the world.

Have a beautiful week.

Doreen Yaffa
Board Certified Marital & Family Attorney, Life Coach

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