Yaffa Family Law Group
By: Doreen Yaffa

Monday Message: September 21, 2020

Looking Forward: Building an Amazing Life

The reality is that you win or you learn.

The saying goes, “You win or you lose.”

I completely disagree with this message. The reality is that you win or you learn.

There are no failures in life, only lessons. As a child, when we failed at riding a bike, we dust ourselves off and tried again. You may not have thought about it but subconsciously your mind was learning what you did wrong and how to correct it. After a few tries, you learned to ride.

The same way you learned to ride a bike applies to almost every single area of your life. Think back to your first relationships and you might cringe. You made mistakes but you didn’t realize it.

Many times, I see clients beating themselves up for making a relationship mistake. They see it as a loss. I don’t. There is no winning in divorce, only opportunities for learning what did not work, what may need to be worked on for themselves, and what they want from their future. They didn’t lose, they learned.

Instead of approaching new challenges with a win or lose mentality, think, “What is the lesson I need to learn here?” This will also help you foster a sense of gratitude because your challenges are your learning opportunities. If you’re not learning, you’re not living.

My challenge to you this week is to take a look at your past “loses” and reframe them as lessons. How did they ultimately make your life better?
Stay healthy in mind and body and have an amazing week.

Stay healthy in mind and body and have an amazing week.

Doreen Yaffa
Board Certified Marital & Family Attorney, Life Coach

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